A Good Day for a Float

Walking down the NCR trail to the put in point
loading in the water
view of the river before we start floating

Me

With the thirty(?) of us out of the water about an hour later. It made room for this next group to float. The river was just littered with people like us who just wanted to float.

List of Current Events

Cape Henlopen tomorrow

Aug. 10, 10pm Anders Osborne at Power Plant Live Courtyard, FREE

Aug. 11 Corn Roast
Aug. 11 Floatilla on the Gunpowder

Aug. 13 Emma moves out

Aug. 18 Hot August Blues
Aug. 18 Family Reunion

Aug. 19 Dinner with friends

Aug. 24 G Love and Special Sauce
Slightly Stoopid
Ozomatli
Aug. 26 Sunday Night Live starts

Aug. 27 School starts - boohoo!

I Never Want to See You Again!

The parting words of My Handsome Prince's CardioThoracic surgeon. Amen to that. He will, though, be forever under the care of his Oncologist.

We are off to the beach for a week. Our favorite home away from home, camping at Cape Henlopen. A week with family (Li'l Sis and kids) and friends so close they are family. We will play capture the flag on the dunes, cook delicious meals over the open fire, kayak, bike, climb the WW II Observation Tower, lay around in hammocks, road trips to DQ, and of course, sunbathe and swim. It's definitely overdue around here.

Back in the Saddle Again

I rode to my sister's house last night. It's about 25 miles away. We were invited to dinner so I thought I would ride and My Handsome Prince would drive bringing our contributions to dinner and my change of clothes. Makes sense. I will never, ever, ever, do that again. It was the third most frightening thing I've experienced. First was climbing the steps of the Duomo in Florence, Second was the swim in my triathlon last year, and now riding the roads from my house to Li'l Sisters house. The route is heavily travelled and has little or no shoulder. Early in the ride, a motorist coming the opposite way, looked straight at me and flipped me the bird. I was not interfering with his way, nor was there anyone behind me. Definitely miss Italian drivers and roads in instances like that. There were several times in the ride, after a huge truck or trailer would blow by me within inches, trying not to overcompensate on my bike (BB is very sensitive), that I almost called MHP to pick me up. But, determined to conquer this ride and this fear, I persevered. I really was not observant about the terrain except turning on to my sisters road, from almost a complete stop, and climbing the shortest, steepest hill, then a lovely downhill breeze until "The Driveway". Straight up, lowest gear, out of the seat, Sambino (his new name after Italy) saying "Hey", Carlman saying "Hey", Li'l Sis saying "Hey do you remember so and so?" as I am still climbing, panting, and unable to speak. I jumped in the pool having only taken off my helmet and shoes.

Dad joined us for dinner. Typical to fashion, we ate wonderful food, drank a little too much vino, and told and heard stories. My sister and her husband speaking of their trip to Italy (totally different/separate from ours). My Dad told a story of going to see Duke Ellington with a friend whose friend was an intimate friend of The Duke. They went back stage, spoke with him, and he even gave them a private little concert. My sister and I were flabbergasted that we had never heard this story. Duke Ellington had taken their addresses and promised them Christmas cards from Europe. He died that year and sometime in the spring, Dad received a card from Duke Ellington's personal secretary, carrying out his promise. Wow.

New Blog

I'm working, very slowly, on my Italy blog. Come take a look.
An Italian Holiday

Day is Done

Day is done,
gone the sun,
From the hills,
from the lake,
From the skies.
All is well,
safely rest,
God is nigh

Our property backs up to a Bible Camp that various groups rent out. There is one group that comes every year. If you pay attention, at 10pm every evening,when this group is there, you can hear someone playing taps. What a wonderful way to end the day. Day is done, day is done.

Status

Lung surgery on July 12, singing in the band July 30.

Enjoying He'brew Genisis Ale, The Chosen Beer.

The girls are gone this week and we are busy. I'm back to work, obviously the man is feeling good, painting the deck, attending meetings, singing. My plans to go to the Gee's Bend exhibit yesterday were foiled by my own lack of attention. Life is back in the fast lane.

Gone

Remember this post? Last week it was still standing. The outside wall had fallend down during a storm a few months ago. But as I walked the route this week, I discovered it had been destroyed by fire. I do not know what the circumstances were. I am saddened. There is a small cabinet right inside the door, somewhat intact, that held Audrey's books and toys, crocheted finger puppets, paper dolls, and more. I'm sure they were still there. A part of her life, a part of mine, gone. I will call Janis to make sure everyone is ok. To let her know I miss her. There will always be a place in my heart for my experiences and my friendship with these people.

Summer Reading List

The Stones Applaud, How Cycstic Fibrosis Shaped My Childhood - Teresa Anne Mullin
Colored People, a Memoir - Heny Louis Gates, Jr.
The Time of Our Singing - Richard Powers
The Memory Keeper's Daughter - Kim Edwards
Complete Feltmaking - Gillian Harris

Some typical brain laxative mysteries


But when I found this book, Gilead - Marilynne Robinson , I opened up and read the first paragraph. I was hooked. It only got better:

"I really can't tell what's beautiful anymore. I passed two young fellows on the street the other day. I know who they are, they work at the garage. They're not churchgoing, either one of them, just decent rascally young fellows who have to be joking all they time, and there they were, propped against the garage wall in the sunshine, lighting up their cigarettes. They're always so black with grease and so strong with gasoline I don't know why they don't catch fire themselves. They were passing remarks back and forth the way they do and laughing that wicked way they have. And it seemed beautiful to me..."

It goes on, lovely. I'm only a few pages in and it has struck a chord in me.

Another thing added to my Summer List

Check out this link
I'm definitely going.

The Story of Our Days

Monday was Audrey's birthday. She had been out the night before to a concert where some of her friends were playing. She then spent the night at another friend's house, whose parents let her choose what she wanted for breakfast. She got donuts, scrapple and bacon. Mmmmm. Her Grandmommy and Aunt picked her up at the meeting point and brought her home to us, where I had presents and had made cupcakes. After the initial hoopla was over, including some cards for MHP, she showered, got on the computer and was promptly bored. She even said next summer she does not want to be home at all. Just put a knife through my heart. Of course, she did not mean it that way. Yesterday came on the heels of 10 days in Italy and 6 days in New York, friends, and a concert. I know what she meant but it made me think.

We are a family that has many opportunities. I believe in taking advantage of them and that the ones we have taken have enriched our lives. We've done a small bit of travelling, due to the generousity of my Father in law, but we have a lot of experiences that are priceless. Deciding to feed a homeless shelter for a birthday, gatherings with family, learning something new, the various work trips that are available to my children through church, free concerts in communities, camping with friends, our children's involvements in school, having fun together, but mainly leaving ourselves open to experience something new.

This week is a week of different opportunities. Today alone, we had 9 visitors. We hardly ever have visitors! We have a fridge full of food. I knit away while we watch movie after movie. I've read two books. I've even started hanging my laundry outside again. This is a time of renewal, of slowing down, of taking time, taking stock, and taking care of one another. Even Audrey has finally caught on and took a nap while the tv droned on and the phone rang beside her. She did not even twitch. Ahhh.

I will post soon on my Italian Holiday and my Back to Camp. In the meantime, take a moment, read a book, sit outside and wave to those who drive by, start a new project, finish an old one, or just enjoy the nothingness.

The photo is of My Handsome Prince in his new throne, a motorized recliner that assists him in and out, along with the puppy that won't leave him alone. She even follows him ever so slowly into the bathroom and ever so slowly out and back into the chair.

Wanting Contact

A year or so ago, I went for a massage. One of my class participants gave me a gift certificate for a massage, someone I did not know very well. It was a very kind and generous gift. One of the things that struck me the most about the massage was the fact that the woman prayed over me. It was not quite silent, but whispered. I don't know what she prayed for but it was over me. It was a very moving experience.



On Wednesday, before I left camp and at the last group gathering, I was helped up onto a chair in the center of the room. Then everyone in the room circled me and layed their hands upon me. Those who could not, touched those in front of them. I took a moment to actually look at everyone, to see those who were touching me, praying for me. Then the prayers started, very simple, safe journey, healing, strength. The most amazing part was my body was humming, there was energy flowing from the hands into me. Just as soon as it started, it was over. I don't know if I will ever experience anything like that again. It was amazing.



I'm not one of those evangelistic people. I'm fairly quiet in my faith, still questioning, still searching. But love exists and is an amazing power. Believe.



I am willing - lay your hands on me
I am ready - lay your hands on me
I believe - lay your hands on me, over me
over me
Lay your hands on me
Lay your hands on me
Lay your hands on me, over me
Peter Gabriel

Good News

I arrived home late Wednesday night after 5 days of Christian youth camp. I am so far removed from my ordinary life that it is not funny. Dinner and a glass of wine, small conversation with My Handsome Prince about the next day, comparing camp stories with Emma, early to bed. Thursday morning arrived despite my wish to completely skip over it. We left the house before 6am, Big Dad taking us to Johns Hopkins Hospital. Once again, in pre-op, we received scary information about extra tubes, in his neck, down his throat for 24 hours, in his back...Surgery came and went with only one extra surprise, another small nodule not found in any scans. It was removed. Still, a little extra tearing of his lung, due to the previous lung resection, possible longer hospital stay, yada, yada. Well, so far, it's been quite the opposite. His pain has been managed so much better, no extra tubes, telling us what we need to do to get his prescription for his hospital chair, giving the nurse a hard time, being his usual PIA. He called me this morning to let me know he's feeling ok, no nauseau so far, and moving out of ICU soon. YES! I still will be removed from ordinary life, but it is all good.

We are Home

We arrived home last night from a whirlwind trip to Italy. I leave tomorrow morning, bright and early for Bethany Beach. Audrey leaves Sunday afternoon for her trip to New York with the Youth Group. Pat and Emma will be home by themselves for a few days before surgery on Thursday. I will post when and if I can. Ciao, Ciao! (I love saying that!)

Girls shopping in Sorrento.

Arrivederci!

We leave tomorrow for destinations of Rome, Naples, Sorrento, Capri, Amalfi, Lucca and Florence. We leave with some apprehension. I always feel some anxiety for my pets left at home. Even more so, with one dog and cat at home, and the pup with another family. I know they will all be fine but I can't help it. I worry about my Mom, left at home, neither my sister nor I will be home to check up on her. I worry about how crazy I was to accept a position as a camp counselor and leave for the beach barely 24 hours after we get home from Italy. I worry about being a camp counselor for high school kids. I worry about leaving camp early to come home for the surgery. I worry about the surgery and recovery. So, I sit here and drink a beer. I think about how I'm going to change my attitude towards some of my travel partners, and recognize their goodness underneath their demons that I do not understand. I think about wonder and hope I can teach my children to just stop and wonder, look, listen, smell. I want to lay on the floor and look up at the Sistine chapel, I want to see, again, the Trinity by Masaccio, I want to smell the Pharmacia de Santa Maria Novella, I want cappucinos, pasta, tartufo, and wine. I want to experience new and relive some of the old. It will not be the same trip I took years ago, but it will be wonderful because we will make it so.

I will not post for some time unless I have a rare opportunity. You can be sure I will keep a journal, I will take photos, and just like the Terminator - "I'll be back".

What I've been doing:

sewing a new skirt, sewing a halter top, picking up a free ping pong table, challenging my family to a tournament, downloading new music, blogging this post, anything that keeps me from...

What I should be doing:
packing and cleaning

A Long, Hard Day

I watched a grown man cry today. He had just reached the end. I had seen him at various stops at Johns Hopkins Outpatient Center, obviously having some sort of surgery. At the last stop, express something or other, I heard him say something about "stressful day" then he lost control and wept, with people all around. At that time, My Handsome Prince walked out of express something or other, and we left. That's what people do at Hopkins. What I wanted to do was touch the mans hand.

Just moments before, a young girl called out to me "Are you following us?" She and her husband had been running the same circuit, with CT scans, surgeon consultation, anesthesiology meetings, blood work, EKG,...We chatted a bit about our husbands upcoming surgeries, both having lung resections. She stated, "Well, this will be it." I didn't tell her, that no, this is not it. Even if it does not come back, there will be appointments. There will be tests. There will be waiting, with baited breath. There will be results. Always.

I sat next to a woman who came from Indiana, never having been in Baltimore, trying to find a place to stay, with a list of posh hotels, provided by Hopkins, not finding one she could afford. I told her to go outside the city limits into the county. I hope she found something. I heard a woman whisper to her husband "I'm okay." She had on a lovely skirt and I told her. She almost seemed giddy.

We heard nothing new and yet the news was worse this time around. Because of a previous lung resection, the pain will be worse, the risks will be worse, the hospital stay will be longer, the recovery longer. While this is not good news, there is good news. We are never alone. He is healthy. We have family. We have each other. We have friends. We have an absolutely wonderful trip to Italy in a few days.

We also had hovering over us, the realization that his Grandmother may die while we are gone. We spoke of the life that his Grandparents, Mother and Aunt are leading now. Something needs to change and the decisions that need to be made. Another difficult situation.

Nothing is easy, yet we finished the long day with margaritas and Mexican food, hands held over the table, silent. We came home to a beautiful, happy daughter who spent a nice day with her Grandma, getting beautified. We came home to huge piles of laundry that had been washed, dried, and folded by the oldest. We spoke with my Mother, who is having her own health issues, which will be next. And we will take care of her. It is life's cycle.

School's Out For Summer!

Italy, doll quilts for babies being born, working in a homeless shelter in NY City, embroider merit badges, counseling different camps for high school youth, middle school youth, and elementary school youth, box challenge, Cape Henlopen, tubing down the Gunpowder river, paper mache, summer reading on the swing or hammock, t-shirt quilts for campers, moving one into her first apartment, major surgery, lovely afternoon naps, games, free concerts, Artscape, finish a flagstone patio, have a picnic, go for a hike, ride (of course), walk on the beach, make a mobil, eat crabs, have friends over, paint a picnic table, find a chandelier for under the tree, learn to cook authentic mexican food, plant sunflowers, make the deck a late afternoon haven, work on an Interfaith build for Habitat for Humanity, plan a trip to New York, Philly, Annapolis, Baltimore or DC, American Visionary Arts museum, slide down a giant slide in western MD, go swimming, these are some ideas ...


What are you going to do?

Shhhh, be vewy, vewy quiet

The Sergeant Major is sleeping.

I'm so proud of My Handsome Prince. Happy Father's Day to you, my darling. I'm so happy you are home. I can never say it enough. What a good man you are!

I Know This Much Is True

That a ride is the perfect time to contemplate world peace, the next project and what's for dinner

That weeds can be beautiful

That what comes down must go up

That hills never get any easier despite the bike and years of experience

That red winged blackbirds and goldfinches abound

That I like solitude

That there is no such thing as silence

That it can be a spiritual experience

It Got Worse

Yup, it did. One of our guests didn't make it, calling late, the girls encountered an accident on their way home, called me for an alternate route, waited, waited, waited, called again, we finally found one. Called at 1AM, they ran out of gas (driving my truck whose guage does not work and we go according to mileage). They should have had plenty.

The good news is: We all had a delicious dinner and we all made it home, safe and sound. I unplugged the phone this morning to sleep in, and my truck was still at the bottom of the hill. All is well, I just had to complain for a moment.

Some Days Are Just Like That

Take Monday, for example. Monday was delightful. No other word could describe it. I went for a great ride on BB, smelling the sweet perfume of honeysuckle, startling some people with my cheery good morning, enjoying the sights and sounds of the back roads. My sister came over and I helped her with a skirt along with completing some much needed mending. Within an hour of her departure, Mom and her friend Sylvia came over with their crocheting. We sat on the patio below, had a delicious dinner, and spent the rest of the early evening up on the deck after the sun went down a bit. Delightful.

Now today has been anything but delightful, starting with a stinky, gross, odor coming from the refrigerator. Cleaning out the fridge makes me gag. It's typically the Prince's job but this smell was not going to wait 4 more days. Later, a conversation just rubbed me the wrong way, I blew off my ride, couldn't find an important email, nobody is returning my phone calls, do you want more? I finally decided that going for a ride was the only way to redeem my day and to take a camera would make it even better. Not! Not even a half mile from the house, I had to stop to figure out how to ride with the camera accessible, one foot out of the clip less pedal (one in - can you tell where this is going?). Like a slapstick comedy, one moment I was standing the next I just toppled over sideways attached to my bike. I dropped the F bomb so loudly a woman 3 houses away came out into the road to see what the commotion was all about. The rest of the ride was not quite that bad, but literally followed that path. I'm home with a sore wrist and dinged dignity. I'm afraid to touch needle and thread for what disaster might strike.

Later in the day....
I stopped at the liquor store to buy a bottle of wine to take with me to my sister's, closed between 1-4 today, What the f***?

Tornados in the area, we are in the basment for a birthday party.

5 or 6 phone cut off cell calls, I finally talk to my Prince.

I'm going to bed.

This is My Father

This is My Father, Dad, Papa to the girls. Sometimes a Daddy will slip out. My Father is a scholar, a minister, a philosopher, a caregiver. I don't see him as often as I should but we talk almost daily. When I was a young girl, he took me downtown to Chicago, probably more than once but they all meld together in my memory. We got locked in a stairwell at the Civic Center, saw Pete Seger, played amongst the stone chess tables along the lake and he took photos. A fine day or days. He would take off on Mondays and make soup, oxtail, greek lemon rice, bean. Mmmmm. Because he was a minister, sometimes we did things that our peers did not, such as attend daily Advent worship services before 7AM (before school), when is was bitter cold in the big church.

My Father loves music. He has season tickets to the Baltimore Symphony Orchestra and always shares an evening with my sister and me. He used to listen to music on the stereo with those great big headphones and conduct the music with great emotion. He gets more enjoyment out of things than anyone I know. He has come to almost every production, band concert, choral concert that the girls have been part of. He laughs louder and more often, than anyone, with such joy. He really listens to the music, 4th grade concerts up to BSO, and can speak of the music, it's complexity or ease, what sections were good, the movement. He still remembers one of my concerts, at Halloween, I was dressed as a butterfly playing the flute and speaks of it once in a while. He inspired the monthly Lansdowne Concerts on the lawn and what a great community service they are.

Emma, first grandchild, was born during a difficult time for my parents and they separated shortly after her birth. My Dad would come out to our house weekly to spend time with Emma while I taught aerobic classes. He would take her for walks in her stroller, or they would walk hand in hand, looking at the moon, discussing important things, petting dogs, observing nature. He now has another grandchild who spends this kind of time with him. I only hope her family knows and treasures how lucky their child is to have this time with him.

Tonight we will go to my sister's house to celebrate Sammajamma's 2nd birthday and Dad will be there. I will wish him Happy Father's Day, give him a token cd, and tell him his true gift can be found here, for the world to see, from my heart.

Bike litter

I hosted a bike ride and brunch on Saturday. It was a service I offered for the Youth's talent and service auction. Four of us rode the hills Maryland and the potholes of Pennsylvania. It was a beautiful day, lovely ride, and included the rescue of a turtle. Afterwards, those who did not ride joined us for lunch. I provided delicious paninis, salad with lettuce from my porch, brownies made by Audrey the brownie queen, blueberry coffee cake, fruit, gatorade, water, and iced tea. It was all scarfed down without a crumb left. The riders arrived around 9:30ish and all stayed until 3pm. These were people I was not well acquainted with and they were best friends with each other, yet I did not feel left out. I had a delightful time hearing the stories of their friendship, their history, and their future. I envy them a bit. By the time they left, I had the phone number of the one rider who is within a few miles of me with the promise that we will ride again. Black Betty, you have done your job.

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

The Good
A trip to Barnes and Noble with my girls, arms loaded with books, cds, asking opinions, making decisions, coming home with good reading, inspiration and music; falling asleep on the couch with my oldest in the middle of the day; the brief, fleeting, head on shoulder, I love you moment with my youngest, riding Black Betty and actually laughing aloud; puppy on my lap while sewing; Oldest is not hurt; remaking disaster skirt into sporty skirt; riding around Hanover, hand/camera out the window, documenting my commute for a future post.

The Bad

A fuss with a friend over a miscommunication, unknown to me; a change in my work schedule that shouldn't be there, not realizing it, and showing up for work; My Handsome Prince gone all week with another to go; making a skirt and having it too wide and too short;


The Ugly

I'll let this speak for itself

Bumper car with a guardrail, each panel bumped. bummer.

Meet Black Betty

"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness," for buying a bike, that is. I have little money for foolishness. I have enough to pay for another year of college without a loan. I have enough, maybe, for our trip to Italy. I have enough for a bit of fun, a haircut, a massage, a lunch, a beer. But enough for a high performance road bike? I think not! Yet this opportunity presented itself and I could not overlook it.

It is time. It is time in my life to rekindle the flame. To go to the open road, look for an owl, smell the woods, stop and listen to the silence, pet the cats, fly from the dogs (and believe me, on Black Betty, I'll fly!). It is time for mileage, time to ride to work, ride to shop, ride for photos, ride for fun, ride, ride, ride. Tomorrow Black Betty and I have our first date. I'm nervous, I'm excited, I probably won't sleep. I'm skipping church for her. It will be my Sabbath. I think I'm in love already. I'm ready and so is she.

Wardrobe Refashion

I'm always inspired by this site. I've never taken the pledge or submitted anything but believe me, I've go enough to do it. Here is my first endeavor. I took a jumper that has been sitting in my closet for many years. I think the last time I wore it was in 1997? I never had the heart to throw it out, even though there was a nice grease stain on the front. So, I cut off the top, put in an elastic waist, cut up a hanky, made a pocket to cover the stain, and now I have skirt loveliness. How'd I do? Did I pass?

Show and Tell

I have a few things to share today.

A purse knit by my Aunt. Don't you just love the colors?

Mom's Granny squares. She's made about 50, intending to make a vest but has since changed her mind.

My new quilt I won on ebay. It is so bright and cheery. This quilt was made from all kinds of fabrics, most especially double knits, which would probably make some quilt purist cringe. This thing will be indestructable! I just love the retro look of the fabrics. It was made by piecing the log cabin strips by hand onto a backing fabric, which forms the quilting on the back. There is no quilting on the front. Each block then is prequilted when the whole thing is put together. The front must be pieced together, the the backs slipstiched. Tons of work involved in this thing. I won it from Calamity Kim. Check out her blog. She does some amazing collage work in fabric.

"It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this"

I went to Lansdowne Christian Church this morning to celebrate the 103rd Memorial Day service of the Grand Army of the Republic. This is my father's church. I don't attend very often, but when I do, I am always struck by the truly spiritual touch, the modern, yet, old ways of worship, the public speaking aloud of concerns and joys during prayer, the pauses, my Dad striking his chest during a prayer, sometimes the memorization of the text, and always lots of hymns. This is a very small, old (age wise) congregation. They have one child, who attends church but attends our youth group. We share an Associate Minister within the two congregations. We are a large, very active, intergenerational congregation, with much to offer, yet I believe this older congregation has just as much to offer us. We are trying to come together but today was yet, another day, where we failed to do so. An important day in each congregation with no thought to sharing this day with each other. I think it is a lack of communication. I am not even sure our congregation is even aware of this celebration at Lansdowne. I am saddened that I had to decide this morning where I should go, which worship should I attend. I am happy with my decision, though and found the service wonderful, touching, and historical. I will attend more often.

My Uncle was the speaker today, the subject being Lincoln's Words in His Time and Ours. He spoke of the first official Memorial Day at Arlington National Cemetary, with the house enshrouded in black, flowers placed on the graves of Union and Confederate soldiers. He recited the Gettysburg address, and recited this quote "With malice toward none; with charity for all; with firmness in the right, as God gives us to see the right, let us strive on to finish the work we are in; to bind up the nation's wounds; to care for him who shall have borne the battle, and for his widow, and his orphan--to do all which may achieve and cherish a just and lasting peace, among ourselves, and with all nations." Speaking of the relevance of this statement to today as much as then. He spoke of history not being that long ago, despite the perception of it being ages ago, especially to youth. He spoke of Lincoln, the man, his humility, and his faith though he never joined a church. I enjoyed it thoroughly. It was the first time that I heard my Uncle speak in person (I've seen him on TV). I sat with my Aunt who sang very softly, but when she did, reminded me of my Grandmother. My Sister and her husband behind me, with Carl, who sometime in the service snuck out to be the acolyte. We could see him behind a flag and My Dad whispering to him. I loved it.

After Lincoln's words, the Auxilary to the Sons of Union Veteran of the Civil War read the actual declaration made by General John Logan, spoke of the ritual of the vacant chair and sang a song. They were dressed in white with red/white and blue sashes. Then the VFW post, who has been participating in this service for 87 years, made their presentations to the alter. Very official with their salute at the end of each presentation, with a few whispers as to order. A beautiful song "Sleep Soldier Boy" sung by a friend, once again, a first for me to hear her, and lastly taps at the back of the sanctuary, with the door open, for the neighborhood to hear as well.

It was only the second time I can remember ever truly memoralizing for Memorial Day. The other time was with Girl Scouts. Typically we view it as a day off school, work, time for cookouts, or various sales at retail places. Something to think about.

I was unable to stay for conversation, lunch, and music much to my disappointment. But I had to divide my time and attend the picnic at my congregation.

A good day.

And These Things Do Please Me Well

A housefull of kids, eating, playing, spending the night, going to church.

My children shining in a performance together

The knowledge of who received my love rug and love it, say it even smells good (patchouli).

Good cycle classes even though there were primarily two of us all week.

Pilates - I love Laura!

Time well spent organizing my studio and calling it a studio.

A wonderful choral concert.

Reconnecting with an old friend, whose influences on me and my children were important.
Songs shuffling on my ipod in the kitchen.
Good, old fashioned potato salad.
1234 cake.
My sister called with one word "Nocturnica". Grace Potter and the Nocturnals appeared last night at the 8x10 (I didn't go). In honor, I share this video. I still haven't found myself but the person videoing had to have been right, smack dab behind me. She's freakin' rockin'!http://www.gracepotter.com/2006/12/video-treat-me-right-live-at-8x10.html

Joseph and the Amazing Techinicolor Dreamcoat. The cast, the crew, the dreamer, the artists, the band, the hairy Ishmaelites, and especially the Narrator and Nephtali, but really everyone involved in this wonderful production. It was an incredible show.

Clean Plate Club

This is the show/recipe I saw. She also made a salad of fresh greens, sliced strawberries and a dressing of strawberry jam, balsamic vinegar, and olive oil. Mmmmmm. Needless to say, she has better presentation on tv, but all 4 of us were members of the clean plate club. This was a keeper, or as Shorty would say "Tastes very musty" as in must have some more/must make again.

Food for thought

My local Super Suppers has closed. I don't think they were even open 9 months. It was close, convenient, and suplemented on the nights I had to work. It just so happens that the day I received the email about the closing, I chose to take a nap, and instead watched Rachel Rae. She was making Sammys. Don't you just love that? My Handsome Prince and I, since Emma was little, sing a song every time we make sandwiches. It's from a Fred Penner tape Em had when she was little.

Sandwiches are beautiful
Sandwiches are fine
I like sandwiches, I eat them all the time
I eat them for my supper and I eat them for my lunch
If I had a hundred sandwiches, I'd eat them all at once!

(this is sung very dramatically, with a huge finish!)

I promptly went out and bought one of RR 30 Minute Meal books and we are having sammys for dinnner, complete with song, and a lovely strawberry and lettuce salad (lettuce that I'm attempting to grow). Just the thought makes me smile.

PS My aunt and uncle remember this tape, but the song they sing is "The cat came back, the very next day..."

State of Affairs

In the midst of everything, we wait again. And we have our answers, expectations, more questions, and our comfort. We are trying to take care of some loose ends, booking hotels in Italy, getting orders to attend a military academy, arranging our work schedules so we can take 6 weeks off, finding Emma an apartment (no campus housing for this one), deciding whether we can afford a beach house, can we do it now? performances, performances, performances (5 this week) and more. In the car, with screaming baby, laughing children, my husband called my cell, from Baltimore to Chicago, confirmed the news that yes, another spot, another surgery. I've just been waiting to say anything.

Happy Mother's Day!

Cheers! Black and tans on the deck.

And something to make you laugh.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TY8GUXPnVyM

Knit-a-long

My sister and I are having a knit a long. After attending the Sheep and Wool fest last weekend, we have many, many ideas. We are starting with the Noni Adventure bag in huge form. Check out there web site here. The adventure bag is in their Fall 2006 line. I found it at my local yarn shop. Here is my color choice. I haven't seen hers yet, but when I do, I will post a photo. Does anyone want to knit-a-long? If so, just leave a comment. If not, enjoy our progress.

Separated at birth?

Audrey 1996 Illustration for Ramona 1981

How did they know what Audrey was going to look like 12 years before she was born? This book was pointed out to me by the librarians at our local library when Audrey was about 4, then the book was given to me by my MIL because she thought it looked so much like Audrey.

This is Sam

Emma shared this with My sister and me. She said it reminded her of Sam. Check it out!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m4l2UUueH5Q

These are My People

Grandma and her granddaughters and great grandchildren.

Uncle Dick and Sammajamma. Uncle Dick is a true Papa, loving, funny, tender.
This is the hysterical. Can you see the genuine laughter on their faces?




Emma and Maddy. I could just eat her up!

Mother and daughter, My Grandma and Aunt.

An Uncle with his nephew.

Sisters caught in a not so unusual, silly act.

Sam saying his abosolute, favorite word in the whole world!

Cousins in conversation. I'm missing a photo of my cousin John. He was in a couple but they were not good. Sorry John. I think that is everyone.

When we got home, Rachel and I met our Mom and Aunt at the Maryland Sheep and Wool Festival. Here are the ladies. Aren't they cute?

We had a good trip. It ranged from hysterically funny to sad. We got lost, took many wrong turns, and exits, while the kids asked "Do you know where we are? Did we take another wrong turn? When are we going to be there?" They were so patient, flying, delays, driving, visiting. They were also obnoxious, making us laugh with their silliness. We visited with our Grandma, our Uncle and Aunt, and had a gathering at our hotel with all who could come. At one point, Uncle Dick stated that this was not right, that Christine should be there. It wasn't right. She should be there with the cousins and her children. It was a moment of unsureness. Did we do the right thing? Was it too soon? Or will there never be a good time, when the two daughters of his brother visit, the gathering of family, bringing with them the reality of loss. So hard. But we told stories of life now and life as kids. We heard of Christine's magic show at a birthday party of John's that we did not know about. After everyone left, Rachel and I cleaning up, we embraced and cried, about family differences yet the importance that we all felt of being together, loss, stories told, our Grandma and her force of connecting us and concluded it was a good trip. Our children saw and heard of their family they know little of and know of the goodness of family, immediate, and distant. And when home, met up with the ladies who have influenced us to be the perfect travelling companions for each other, to laugh with and at each other, to be sisters. And that my friends, was our trip.

Off We Go!

Here we are, My sister and me!

She loves me.

I love her too!

We leave this morning with all children in tow to fly to Chicago area to be with family. Our Grandma has never seen Sammajamma and it's been 3 years since she's seen all our kids. It's the right time to go.

Apple Sunshine, again

Is she just the cutest thing ever? This is where she chooses to sit while I'm driving. Yes, we take her everywhere. Don't worry, we were stopped at road work.

Skirt Love

Okay, I'm delusional. I envisioned lovliness. We would look beautiful, our fabrics piled neatly, looking so... neat, 2 skirts a piece finished, lovely photos of our finished skirts. Not exactly what happened. First off, I hadn't showered in almost 24 hours, and had taught 5 classes, so I didn't look and smell so hot. There goes that vision. Then I dumped my breaking shopping bag of loot onto my sisters table, totally covering her lovliness (and yes, it was lovely). The dogs played, then got on each other's nerves. Apple Sunshine went after Gordy, not a good thing. Sammajamma woke up. We played with the puppie and we played with Sam. As soon as we started, it was time to leave. Ugh. Well, two days later, I have finished my skirt and showered (well, that came yesterday). I will make some adjustments for the next one, but other than that, I am pleased. It will be a perfect summer skirt. I'm not delusional when I say I will be wearing skirts all summer and that will be lovely.

Getting to know you

This has been going around via email with My Handsome Prince's Family, so thought I would share it here:

1. What is your occupation? Wife, Mother, fitness instructor
2. What color is your underwear? Honestly, I mostly go commando
3. What are you listening to right now? Songs that Speak of the Spirit - a playlist I made of songs that speak of hope, peace, faith, etc.
4. What was the last thing you ate? roast beef, mushroom, swiss cheese panini that I just made for Emma and me
5. Do you wish on stars? no, eyelashes
6. If you were a crayon, what color would you be? Never thought of it
7. How is the weather right now? beautiful
8. Last person you spoke to on the phone? Emma to ask what she needed from the grocery store
9. Do you like the person who sent this to you? yes
10. How old are you today? 43
11. Favorite drink? good coffee. Did I say good?
12. Favorite sport to watch? swim meets but haven't been to one since my girls stopped swimming
13. Have you ever dyed your hair? yes, but I refuse to hide my grey
14. Do you wear contacts or glasses? glasses to read
15. Pets? Gus, the designer dog, Apple Sunshine, the princess and Punkin, the Queen
16. Favorite month? July
17. Favorite food? Mexican
18. What was the last movie you watched? The Pursuit of Happyness (yes, it's spelled that way)
19. Favorite day of the year? A day with my family
20. What do you do to vent anger? internally fume, then explode, yelling
21. What was your favorite toy as a child? Can't think of a toy, just playing outside with the neighborhood
22. Fall or Spring? Fall
23. Hugs or kisses? Hmm, both
24. Cherry or Blueberry? depends on what it is. Fresh cherries, yum. Blueberry pie, yum
25. Do you want your friends to email you back? ok
26. Who do you think will respond? I haven't decided who it is going to
27. Who is least likely to respond? see above
28. Living arrangements? My Handsome Prince, Emma and Audrey
29. When was the last time you cried? When Ellen sang on Sunday. That song always makes me cry.
30. What is on the floor of your closet? Shoes and dry cleaning
31. Who is the friend you've had the longest? My sister
32. What did you do last night? spent it in the car with My Handsome Prince coming home from the eastern shore
33. Who inspires you? My husband and children always inspire me to be a better person
34. What are you afraid of? car accidents and rats (that's why I never go to Elizabeths)
35. Plain, cheese or spicy hamburgers? All if they are on the grill
36. What is your favorite car or truck? I guess that would have to be the one I'm driving, as long as it runs and is dependable I don't really care, although I really miss my puzzle truck
37. Favorite dog breed? Morhound (hound plus moron, yup, that's Gus) and Chihuahua, of course this will change with whatever breed follows these two
38. Number of keys on your key ring? I'm not going upstairs to count
39. How many years at your job? Wife, 22 and counting, Mother 19 and counting, Fitness instructor 20 and counting, but 6 at the YMCA
40. Favorite day of the week? Any day but Tuesday
41. How many states have you lived in? 2
42. How many cities have you lived in? I've lived in 4 towns
43. How many countries have you lived in? One

Feel free to answer these yourself.

Ready, Set, Go!

Okay, it's Tuesday. My bed is made, I had plain oatmeal for breakfast, delivered the papers, went to Pilates, taught my Seniors, checked a couple things off my to do list, have killer workouts for my classes this evening and am planning a date with my hook, my rug, and a movie. How's that?

Monday Musings

I know Sunday is the official start of the week, but I feel Monday is the start. It's the day when the routine starts again. The day when you can really make the changes that you need to make. The day you organize the rest of the week. Today, the new session started. It WAS (key word here) the day I was jumpstarting my fitness and diet routine. What did I do? Slept in, ate nachos for lunch. Yuck. Can Tuesday begin my week?

Anyway, I'm trying to get my classes together for the week. I've looked at the rosters and see it's mostly the same people so it's time to challenge them and myself. It's time to start lifting, swimming and running again. I've signed myself up for a weight management course so I have a support system to make the right choices. I haven't changed much, but just need that inspiration and motivation to keep this up. It's a lifelong pursuit and anyway that I can achieve it, I will.

This week I need to finish my Love rug, make my songs of the spirit cd, pick up chips at the Utz outlet for 200 people, make a giant pasta salad, make 2-3 pans brownies, help the Prince with his scrapbook page for his Grandma. Those are the big ticket items along with routine cleaning, teaching, delivering papers, cooking, and working nights. And who can forget...OZOMATLI, Wednesday night Baby! "Party people rock the house, party people rock the house!"

I had all kinds of reflections of my time last week. There is no other way to say it. It was sad, terribly sad. My Dad, in his own grief, sick with a virus, was a rock for his brother and performed the ceremony just as he should. I had to call my sister the day we were leaving, just to talk to her, hear her voice, tell her I loved her. And the mystery of life goes on. There are still mornings to rise, meals to make, rides or walks to take, work to do, with a void, a hole, so enormous that it's almost inconceivable, and yet we/they do. My Uncle, his wife, my cousin, Pete, Ben, and Maddy. I wish them peace when they are ready.

I called my elementary schoolhood friend, Karen, who lives in the midwest, to tell her the news. She knew my cousins, lived a block behind them. She, too, had news. Her partner of many years had died unexpectedly shortly after she had seen him. Sad. The tragedy at Virginia Tech hit close to home, also. It was Emma's friend's dorm that was hit. She is okay, but she, too, has an emptiness to fill.

I am home, with my children, my husband, checking in on my father, getting together with family. Life goes on.

Cousins

Today I watched my kids with their cousins. I watched them all hunt for Easter eggs, with my two sharing a basket. They kept others occupied while we hid, too. I watched (or rather, heard) the oldest and the youngest have a screaming competition, and turn the younger, grouchy screams to laughter. I watched the middle one tenderly care for the puppy. I watched the girls gather together on the couch, eating their candy, and also take up one corner of the table to eat together, my two gathering their girl cousin to them. We talked of how much they enjoy being together, despite the range in age from 19 to almost 2. It's a wonderful, family relationship. May the Circle Be Unbroken.

We were like that growing up. We were a pack with our cousins. There were 7 of us growing up together, and just like Sam, another came along later. By that time, our family had moved from the midwest to the east coast, so we did not watch him grow up. We spent weekends at Grandma and Grandpa's house, eating cinnamon rolls, carving pumpkins, wearing Easter masks or cowboy hats or whatever holiday/prop was on hand, going to dog shows, the circus, helping Grandpa over at the church, or just hanging around. We always wanted to sleep together in G & G's room, with the roll away cot and I guess someone on the floor and a few in their bed (we kicked them out and they slept on the pull out in the tv room). Grandma would tell us stories and rub our backs. When Mark and Christine moved in our neighborhood, literally two blocks away we were estatic! Mark and I were 6 months apart, Rachel and Christine, one year. Now, one of our pack is gone. Daughter, Grandaughter, Sister, Wife, Mother, Cousin, Friend.

My sister and I grieve. We spend a lot of time on the phone wondering when is the right time to make the trip? What do we do for the family? How do we express our sadness? We talk of our father, our uncle, our Grandma, her husband, her children. We just talk. I'm so thankful for that. I will travel with my father this week to Illinois to attend the funeral.

I was gathering songs for my Songs that Speak of the Spirit cd and came upon Paul Simon's "Father and Daughter". I cried. It spoke to me of my Father, but even more, my Uncle, and know the words are true "There could never be a Father that loved his daughter more than I loved you."
If you leap awake

In the mirror of a bad dream
And for a fraction of a second

You can't remember where you are
Just open your window

And follow your memory upstream

To the meadow in the mountain

Where we counted every falling star

I believe the light that shines on you

Will shine on you forever (forever)

And though I can't guarantee

There's nothing scary hiding under your bed

I'm gonna stand guard like a postcard of a golden retriever

And never leave till I leave you with a sweet dream in your bed

Chorus: I'm gonna watch you shine

Gonna watch you grow

Gonna paint a sign

So you'll always know

As long as one and one is two

There could never be a father who loved his daughter more than I love you

Trust your intuition

It's just like goin fishin'

You cast your line and hope you get a bite

But you don't need to waste your time

Worryin' about the market place

Try to help the human race

Strugglin to survive its harshest night.

-Paul Simon

Let's Play Top 10

1. Lucinda Williams concert. Wonderful venue, small sit down theatre, very intimate. Great performance, despite the fact that she had to start two songs over. Such a perfectionist in performing yet looking so uncomfortable on stage. She makes herself vulnerable. It was a great evening with a friend. Bar hopping in the 'burg, lovely dinner, great music, how could it be better?

2. A conversation with my sister about effort. It's making me realize that the source of my own, Whatever, funk, is the lack of my own effort. I'm just going through the motions. It started about others lack of effort, with the classic Why should I bother if no one else cares? and then the lightbulb went off. I realized how hard I worked last year and how much it paid off.

3. Not necessarily top rating but top in memory. The Anders Osborne show I went to that he did not. Bummer. Got our money back, had a good time with Tasha and my Prince, but we were so looking forward to listening to Anders jam and he did not.

4. Puppy, puppy, puppy! AppleSunshine has been so much fun! Neither I nor the Handsome Prince or even Audrey thought much of getting a puppy. Now that she is here, she is so much fun. She is personable, friendly, small, smart, and starts puppy classes this Saturday.

5. Keep up with the Joneses. My neighbor totally finished her quilt. Need I say more.

6. The emergence of spring. Rebirth and regrowth. Remember these? They are budding and flowering!

7. Emma made a school decision.

8. Audrey conquered a fear and auditioned for the Ensemble. Now it's just sit and wait.

9. I finished PT, thank goodness and am feeling better but not quite whole.

10. I can't even come up with 10. Isn't that pitiful?